March 28, 2001

i too can drive!

“you’re too impulsive to be a driver, you think of hundred things at one time, and you’ll go and crash into a wall”

this i was told at a very young age, and it did the unintentional trick. the thought of learning to drive a car, intimidated me forever. even when i tried riding a cycle, there was this huge (imaginary) truck that would appear out of nowhere and i used to jump off my cycle, often hurting myself, or if i was on the road, bruising my ego.

i love speeding in a car or on a bike, but as long as i’m on the back seat. (except when on a horse, its my favourite animal, and i just know i’m good on one)

when i think of the more urban modes of transport, i dream of riding a bike to work, and it has to be an enfield machismo. maybe i’ll not see this happen, but i certainly will never ride on a kinetic honda, or the other more feminine ones…eby used to laugh at my dreams, but i promised him i’d get over my fear of driving, and ride a bike.

but though i sometimes prefer to let things take their time, i had no idea how i’m ever going to put myself in the driver’s seat.

today, i did just that. i went go-karting 🙂

watching the drivers zoom past on the tracks was really scary, my hands and feet felt cold and clammy. i used to feel like this when i was scared of using escalators at any airport or shopping mall. but i got over that at crossroads, when hari forced me to take the escalators at least six times. i was exhausted by the fear and effort it took, but i managed to get rid of the phobia finally.

“NEXT…!”

it was my turn. the voice jolted me out of my endless should-i-or-should-i-not-go-for-it questions, while my trembling fingers handed the guard the four-laps-card.

as i got into the kart, i could barely hear my colleagues cheering me, but i knew this was the only way. just then i remembered that years ago, i’d learnt swimming this way…by just jumping into the water. because if i was in there, i had to survive.

four laps later, i was shaking with excitement. i loved it! and it was only once that i brushed against the rubber-tyre-barricade. my speed result showed 14kmph.

everyone laughed, but so did i.

twenty minutes later, i was doing my second round of six laps, this time it was even smoother. i was confident and a little liberal with the accelerator…26kmph.

yes it was just a game, but i think i learnt far more than the fun part. phobias can never bother you for long, as long as you know that you want to get over it.

all you have to do is dive right into your fear.

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