just watched a good movie after a long time. suddenly i feel it could be anybody‘s story… na?

many
years ago…
deepu, amma and me
navyug society
raincoats and rainyshoes
and a huge umbrella
little blue and white flowers
i think.
hold on tight
i remember us
walking to school
in knee-deep water
mind the pits
from the rains
three nights long
god alone knows what all is in the water
but we have to go to school
and maybe chitti’s house
after that
only if it’s stopped raining
school bags on our backs
books secured in plastic sheets
the stainless steel spoons
going clattery-clank
in our plastic
blue and white
lunch-dabbas.
then achchan will pick us all up
we’re smiling
rains are welcome
always.
mind that car!
i love the water
pretend the wind
does not like my raincap
but amma slides it back
over my head
do you want to catch a cold!?
deepu’s hiding
in her raincoat
tiny fingers clutching
amma’s hands
and mine.
i catch
the twinkle in her eye
as she secretly
grins
to herself
proud
of her new red
gumboots.

deepu and i are now taller than amma (okay, i’m almost taller), our shoes were given away long ago to someone who needed them more than us, and the raincoats flew out of our wardrobes along with our school uniforms.

yet when i was reading a totally unrelated (and long overdue) email from my big little sister yesterday, this picture of the three of us in the rain seemed to be staring back at me.

my, how much and yet how little we all have changed :’-)

praveen‘s just fixed the archive problem in my blogger account. so this is a test entry.

there’s so much happening around me these days, lot of thoughts buzzing around in my head too. strangely i haven’t felt like putting them down on my journal…

perhaps its the return of the blogger’s block, perhaps it isn’t. perhaps i don’t know what to call it and i just don’t feel like writing. for now.

maybe if i list some of the 🙂 and the 🙁 this month, it might help me get back to where i left from…

🙂

very surprised and very happy: one of my BEST friends just got engaged! just like that!
unforgettable: our (just praveen and me) one-day trip to bournemouth, in spite of a chilly-bitey-wet-and-windy day. pictures coming soon
exciting: to be back in touch with a friend from home. mayu, this is you…
welcoming: the change in weather…leaves, sunshine, rains, sunshine, lots of green around
busy: freelancing, and with friends rashmi and zubin at home.
talkative: rashmi, very talkative (:-p)
learning: life, me, in an extended family.
waiting: eagerly for my in-laws visiting mid-may. and for the delicious spices and pickles in amma-in-law’s suitcase 😉
biting: into the yummy donuts zubin gets, almost twice a week!
refreshing: my 20- to 30-minute vipassana sessions before bedtime, every night (since a month now). can’t miss. won’t miss.
amusing: from my window right now, i see a squirrel precariously hanging from a birdhouse, stealing all the nuts inside! someone’s going to complain of a tummyache today!
satisfying: crispy home-grown spinach for breakfast, lunch and dinner!
amazing: outside, a pink and blue twilight sky after a drizzly rainy reminding-me-of-bombay day.

🙁

unforgivable: missed a seat on the creative writing class i was so desperate to join, just by a few hours.
frustrating: my blogger account. something’s wrong, again. which is why i cannot update my just-like-that box.
worried: sars in india. sars worldwide.
painful: waiting for the nhs to grant me an appointment with a doctor for my back.
unfinished: abandoned potential journal entries on my to-post file
touching: email and comments from friendly strangers, ordering me to write.

i can now call myself a ‘freelancer’, finally. methinx working from home is quite cool.

when it comes to my home, its almost spooky how similar events seem to re-occur around the same dates. feb 14 was when i moved into a new house, twice, in 24 months. two years ago on march 30 i was clearing my room to accommodate a new roommate, like i’m doing today!

news is when the truth is reported as it is, and not as one would like it to be.

as i watch the iraq-war updates on tv today, i suddenly seem to recollect this first rule in the one (and only) weekend-journalism workshop i’d attended years ago.

us and uk television media want their countries to believe that the war is the only way to go — for both sides. “removing saddam will be a blessing to the iraqi people…” (blair’s address to the nation). obviously, iraqi media wants their arab population to believe saddam is in the right, and that the us and uk are their enemies, destroying their cities since three nights now.

i’ve been glued to the continuous and ‘live’ bbc and sky telecasts…the first time i’ve been following a real war in all my life.

but the reports surely make me wonder what the other side of the story could be. most of the breaking news and stories deal with the bombing in baghdad and mixed reports here and here, on how some of the iraqi troops are beginning to surrender. they also reported how us troops hoisted the american flag in umm qasr, and replaced it with the iraqi one soon after. …that saddam hussein was possibly injured or in hiding; and of course video footages of a war getting increasingly aggressive…

interestingly, the bbc yesterday also showed iraqi television-clippings of a saddam in perfect health, and a baghdad mercilessly being bombarded by the us and uk forces. another news reader on kuwait tv indicated with relief that saddam’s reign was soon coming to an end. also see “you are late. what took you so long?”

were the reports in the middle east desperate to keep up the spirits of the hiding arabs, telling them their leader was alive and well? were the reports by uk and us media desperate to tell anti-war protestors in their countries how their leaders had made the right decision… “some of the iraqis rejoiced and broke into a song and dance when the coalition reached them…,” indicating that not everyone was happy with the dictator’s rule anyway.

neither of the television media are playing up the facts, they’re all telling the truth. perhaps. but all of them certainly seem to be choosing the truths they want to be told.

somewhere in iraq a war is beginning to rage, somewhere in india, a war on the (corrupt) media has been launched…what next? i wait and watch.

praveen and i have been dabbling in the movable type content management system. umm, seems quite friendly…check out his new design and let us know what you think 🙂